11 Aug My Last Week
Talia reflects on the last days of her internship, sharing the relief and serenity she experienced working outside and interacting with the animals.
After nine weeks of watering and soaking and feeding, I am reaching the end of my internship at Chenoa. Thinking about my last week gives me a sense of anxiety that I have never felt before. Anxiety about returning to the “normal” world. Anxiety about not being able to spend my days outdoors. I did not think that I would feel that sense of anxiety when completing an internship. I thought I would feel relief stemming from the completion of a hard task.
Working at Chenoa has given me relief that I never thought I would feel. While weeding gardens and grooming horses an intense layer of calm would wash over me. There is something about knowing that I am being productive through helping another being that calms me down. It makes me not need to think about COVID-19, or my upcoming socially distanced wedding, or whether or not I will be returning to my university in the fall. With so much worry in the world it is so easy to become self-centered and focus on the minutiae in my problems. Being at a farm sanctuary allows me to focus on others and put my effort into giving the animals and people around me the best possible environment.
Calmness is a new friend of mine that I hope to bring with me for the rest of my life. It is an aspect of life that many people miss out on due to getting lost in the hurricane of expectations to be busy at all times. The beautiful thing about Chenoa is that being busy can include sitting, observing, and thinking. In my opinion, if more people were able to stop and think and observe more often, they would be exponentially more productive and more content with their work. I have grown to love Chenoa for the peace it has given me, and I am grateful to Chenoa for teaching me the relief of calm.